the eagles has landed

THE EAGLE HAS LANDED
in 1969 neil armstrong said that famous quote
as his spacecraft landed on the moon

well
this weekend i repeated those words in a tweet
to family members and friend
while standing on the edge of a sandy river bed
near lompoc califronia

i texted
the eagles have landed

who are the eagles
well
its my wife she and her teacher friend from austin
it was a birthday celebration for the teacher
but i wont say which one
but i will say that most folks have a lot of grey hair
at this age and are real close to retirement

so she contacted my wife she
who sometimes is always available for irrational adventures
its my xx birthday and someone wants to give me a gift
to do something i have always wanted to do

when i heard what it was
i thought
ive always wanted to do that too
well
i always wanted to watch someone else
scream as they did it

somehow someway my wife she went from
im not going to do it
those are my famous words all the time to my wife she
im not going to do it
well she went to
ok ill do it

so on that fateful day
we loaded up for the hour drive to a well known skydive
place here
as we were driving
a lot of joking went on
i felt a lot of nervousness in the car

so
we arrived
they isolated the two
made them sign papers
you know those liability ones lawyers make you sign

there on the first page
in bold large letters
you can die doing this

drop the mike i would have
im out of here is what i would have said
done
aint gonna do it

they persisted

after a long long time
they got dressed
after watching a video on things to do
and not to do

as they stood on the tarmac area
on the back of their jump suits
was this big ole danger sign
i never read what it said
i stopped at danger

then they got all their gear on
walked out to the plane to board
wait was what was said
a bird hit the plane
they had to get a ladder to get fragments off the wing

thats when i would have backed out the
second time

then off they went
way way up into the blue clear sky
where we couldnt see them
i wonder if they closed that open door

they apparently were asked
are you scared
well yeah they said

i thought
at least they got those depend things on like
the astronauts wear
so that wouldnt be an issue

then these little specks appeared way up in the sky
i think somewhere around 13000 feet up
or was it 1300
it doesnt matter
either is too high for me

as one jumped out they screamed the whole time
i thought
that has to be my wife she
she screamed as she twisted and floated down
then landed
thats when the screaming stopped
i looked real close
on thats not her

later i asked my wife she did she scream
she said
no no words would come out

finally they floated close enough i could identify her bright
colored leggings she had on
no at least she aint screaming
maybe shes all passed out or something

nope
as she neared the landing sight
she waved real big with those big ole micky mouse gloves
they had to wear
bam
right on her booty

then i could hear her and her friend as they were all excited
as they got their voices back

later i showed them the sign on the fence where they landed

were you scared
yes

did you jump
no the tandem jumper thats behind you just falls out of the plane
since you are attached you just fall with them
no backing out it was

were you cold
yes it was real cold

was it beautiful
it was aaaaammmmmaaazzzzing
my wife she said

are you glad you did it
you betcha

would you do it again
no never

so afterwards i drove the rescue car to pick them
up after their fateful flight
no broken wings
oh
i made up the depends story

the organicgreen doctor