itll be me

ITLL BE ME
last night my wife she and i watched the movie
about glen campbells farewell tour
ill be me


there were parts
well lots of it that were difficult to watch

everyone needs to watch this movie
it shows you what its like to have this disease
and
how inside that brain there is still things that
functioned well
and
could be called up for use

over the last five years as ive learned more and more
about alzheiemers disease
have seen it first hand with my mother and my younger brother
and now with my older brother and to some degree with
my father
i was amazed at how well glen campbell was able to
perform on stage singing his songs
and
doing a decent job
yes it was a struggle on his last concert

so knowing what i know now
i realize he was in a more advanced stage
of the disease during the tour

that explains his rapid decline since the concerts
as he had hit that rapid decline
that fall off the cliff that occurs in the later stages

lucky for us he did his final concert and album
before he got to the cliffs edge

i watched with tears in my eyes
as i saw him record his last song
and doing it well

alzheimers disease does strange things
the music seemed to awake something in his brain
from some deep crevice
that defied the stage of the disease he was in

amazing is what i muttered under my breath
as he sang that final song
im not gonna miss you
even though he couldnt carry on a conversation
when the words came out they didnt always make sense
didnt know his family
couldnt dress himself
couldnt find the bath room
was inappropriate whatever that means when he ate

it was good to watch his family and friends
tolerate his behaviors
just going with the flow
not arguing with him
even during the concerts
as he sang a song twice
or sang a different song than planned

thats the way to handle patients
just go with the flow

i didnt find this movie as disturbing as
still alice
but
i was still misty eyed through much of the movie

especially as i watched him and his speech
and his behavior
it reminded me so much of my younger brother
as he progressed with the disease

then
it did bother me a lot
as i realized
itll be me
one day

the organicgreen doctor