i had a dream

I HAD A DREAM
these are famous words
mlk spoke them years ago
we celebrated his holiday earlier this month
 
im using these words today since i had a dream this week
it wasnt one of vast importance that dr king had
but for me it made me think and wonder a lot

as many of you know who have read this blog some
i have mild cognitive impairment amnestic type that is
thought to probably be due to alzheimers disease
if my dream is true i may have it

i take aricept (donepezil) for this hoping to slow down the
symptoms for a period of time
i dont know if it works but things havent gotten worse in
3 years
it the donepezil makes me have these real vivid dreams

ive been thinking a lot about whether i have the disease or not
as i notice some memory issues that i wonder if its due to
my age since my hair is now full grey or if its the disease
sneaking its head more into my life

however my neurologist thinks i might
my long term disability insurance agrees since they are paying
me my physician salary every year
now the federal government agrees with them
so i must have a problem right
and
of course i feel like thats what i have

the other night now this is in my dream
i was in college in my last year at the university where i
graduated from in california

during the dream i kept getting lost trying to find my classes
to take my final exams
some i even showed up late for
some professors allowed me to go ahead and take the exams

as i was testing i had difficulty taking the exams because i
couldnt remember the material
because i had just been diagnosed with possible alzheimers
and was seeing the effect on my memory
showing up as failing to remember the material i heard
in class studied and tested for

i finished the exams
but i felt like i didnt do well on them
but i never got the scores
so i dont really know how i did
i woke up and when i tried to go back to sleep
i couldnt get back into my dream

it felt strange to be a college student who couldnt remember the
material i had tried to retain
it felt very surreal

so i had a dream the other night
unlike dr king i hope mine
doesnt come true

the organicgreen doctor